Cinema usually demands that its protagonists grow, evolve, or at the very least, change their clothes. Kevin Smith, however, has always been more interested in the stationary. In 1994, he gave us two guys leaning against a counter, complaining about customers. In 2006, he gave us those same two guys: now ten years deeper into the abyss of retail: leaning…
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The cinematic “vacation gone wrong” is a genre built entirely on the fragile ego of the American patriarch. Usually, these films involve a station wagon, a map that won’t fold, and a slow-motion descent into madness. Think Chevy Chase staring into the abyss of a closed Walley World. But in 1992, director Thom Eberhardt decided to trade the asphalt for…
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Action movies in the early 90s usually followed a specific, comforting blueprint. You had the hero, the quip, the explosion, and the inevitable triumph of justice. It was clean. It was aspirational. It was, for the most part, a lie. Then came The Last Boy Scout. Released in 1991, this film didn’t just break the mold; it melted the mold…
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Religious epics usually follow a predictable trajectory. There are robes. There are booming voices from the heavens. There is, almost inevitably, Charlton Heston looking sternly at a piece of granite. Then there is Dogma. Released in 1999, Kevin Smith’s fourth feature film arrived like a molotov cocktail wrapped in a Sunday school flyer. It replaced the burning bush with a…
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Thrillers usually demand a specific set of ingredients to keep the pulse elevated: a high-speed pursuit, a ticking clock, or at the very least, a protagonist who knows how to handle a firearm. Usually, the stakes are measured in body counts or international espionage. All the President’s Men (1976) decides to trade the Glock for a Smith-Corona typewriter and the…
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Survival movies usually follow a predictable, agonizing rhythm. There is the crash. There is the realization that the cell service is non-existent (or, in 1997, that the flares are damp). There is the slow descent into madness, punctuated by the eating of a shoe. Usually, these films are about the triumph of the human spirit. They are about the will…
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The 1990s were a fever dream for sports cinema. It was a decade where we collectively decided that the only thing missing from the professional athletic experience was a heavy dose of the supernatural. We had angels playing outfield for the California Angels. We had a golden retriever dominating the court (and the box office). We had the Looney Tunes…
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The early 1990s were a laboratory for the “star vehicle.” Usually, these films were designed to trap a rising stand-up comedian in a high-concept box, shaking the container until enough box office receipts fell out. It was a proven formula. Mo’ Money (1992), written by and starring Damon Wayans, attempts to be the exception by being everything at once. It…
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Superheroes usually follow a rigid, expensive set of rules. You need a tragic backstory involving high-end jewelry or a radioactive lab accident. You need a jawline that can cut glass. Most importantly, you need a budget that exceeds the GDP of a small island nation. Then there is Darryl Walker. Darryl doesn’t have a high-tech suit or a billionaire’s trust…
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Tomorrow is the big day. February 27, 2026. Ghostface is coming back for a seventh outing, and the buzz is palpable. Sidney Prescott is returning (again), the stakes are allegedly generational, and we are all collectively ready to ask: What’s your favorite scary movie? But before we dive into the new blood, we have to look at the trail of…
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